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In a pastoral realm not our own, magical creatures live in bliss. They spend their days having tea under the glowing Christmas tree-like branches of Yggdrasil, and bathing in steamy hot springs. Their mystical land is so dreamy that every single scene is perpetually washed in white, so that everything is one hazy blur of pink and purple. Our heroine is Lady Lotte, a sassy but cute succubus with a strangely charming spade-shaped tail. Even at the tender age of 10, she knows that the purpose of her kind is to suck out the life-seed of men, which viewers are led to believe is a not-at-all veiled euphemism for fellatio. Upon learning that the queen was renowned for having a harem of men from all walks of creaturedom—except human—Lotte decides, naturally, that she wants a human boy for herself. And lo, one is whisked from Earth, and I'm sure hijinks ensue.
I've gotten to a jaded point in my life where I can watch just about any trainwreck of an anime and think, “Well, this isn't that bad.” And the same is true of Astarotte's Toy. It's banal, yes. It's trite, yes. It's frivolous, yes, yes. And it's basing its entire premise on the allegedly gut-busting idea that there is a perky succubus who is about to wreak havoc on some poor milquetoast's life, even though she thinks boys are icky. It's clichéd to the point of almost being a parody of itself, if only it were that self-aware. But in the end, it's not the worst thing I've ever seen. It's just a waste of time.
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